1. Executive Summary
57.6%Dead
▼ Improving (-8.5% since last check)
| Metric | Value |
|---|---|
| Clinical Notes | "Moving slow, groaning loudly, and actively consuming your cognitive load." |
| Classification | language |
| Age | 14 years (est. 2012) |
2. Algorithmic Evaluation
The following mathematical model was applied to evaluate the existential footprint of elm. The deaditude score is heavily influenced by the components listed below.
D =fage × ∑i=1nWbase,i · qi∑ Wbase,j · qjCi
Where Ci ∈ {GH, SO, RE, HN, YT, JB}
Figure 1: Existential Footprint
Radar analysis mapping the six distinct vectors of existential threat.
Figure 2: Historical Deaditude Evolution
Expected Extinction Date (Approximation): Immortal / Stable
Chronological evolution of existential threat.
2. Clinical Analysis
2.1 Diagnostic Metrics
The following objective indicators have been collected to determine the existential status of this technology:
Codebase Vitality (GitHub)
Not available due to technical difficulties (i.e. we couldn't afford the API quota to analyze 10,000 new JS frameworks this month).
Community Cry for Help (StackOverflow)
- Total Questions (recent): 0
- Answered Ratio: 0.0%
- Accepted Ratio: 0.0%
- Zero Answer Ratio: 0.0%
- Median Response Time (hr): N/A
- Days Since Last Activity: 0
- Trend Direction: stable
Hype & Propaganda (YouTube)
- Recent Videos: 3
- Average Views: 7,598.3
Despair & Existential Dread (Reddit)
- Reddit Posts (recent): 4
- Average Upvotes: 25.0
- Trend Direction: stable
- Trend Growth Rate: -100.0%
Intellectual Discourse (Hacker News)
- Mentions (recent): 1,000
- Average Points: 33.8
- Days Since Last Post: 0
Corporate Adoption (StackShare & Jobs)
- Stacks Using It: 7,172
- StackShare Followers: 0
- StackShare Upvotes: 0
- StackShare Mentions: 0
- Open Job Postings: 2,387
- Jobs Trend Direction: stable
- Jobs Trend Growth Rate: 0.0%
Data retrieved at: 6/30/2026
Appendix A: Recent YouTube Propaganda
| Thumbnail | Video Details | Views |
|---|---|---|
 | Road to v1.0 for elm-cardano | Developers Office Hour Channel: Cardano Community | 63 |
 | Master Bus Processing — Complete Plugin Chain Explained Channel: HoRNet Plugins | 22682 |
 | Elm is Wrong: A Language Where Abstraction Goes to Die? Channel: marxytourguide | 50 |
Appendix B: Reddit Despair Logs
| Post Title | Score | Comments |
|---|---|---|
| Native Elm (the real kind this time) · cekrem.github.io | 42 | 5 |
| Explaining Functional Programming to Non-Programmers (It's Just Excel) · cekrem.github.io | 26 | 0 |
| A batch job, in The Elm Architecture | 21 | 2 |
| codimg: the code block is the URL · cekrem.github.io | 11 | 0 |
Appendix C: Hacker News Discourse
| Topic | Points | Comments |
|---|---|---|
| Sky – an Elm-inspired language that compiles to Go | 183 | 89 |
| The Draft Is Done. Now I Need Reviewers and Feedback (Elm Language) | 5 | 0 |
| Haskell for Elm developers: giving names to stuff (Part 8 – IO) | 4 | 0 |
| Greg Hyman, Co-Creator of Tickle Me Elmo, Dies at 78 | 2 | 1 |
| Show HN: Elmo (Open Source AEO) | 2 | 0 |
Appendix E: Historical Deaditude Scores
| Date | Deaditude Score | Verdict |
|---|---|---|
| 6/30/2026 | 57.6% | Dying Slowly |
| 6/16/2026 | 66.1% | Dying Slowly |
| 6/3/2026 | 62.3% | Dying Slowly |
| 5/20/2026 | 52.2% | Dying Slowly |
| 5/6/2026 | 66.3% | Dying Slowly |
| 4/23/2026 | 60.0% | Dying Slowly |
| 4/9/2026 | 54.7% | Dying Slowly |
| 3/26/2026 | 53.7% | Dying Slowly |
| 3/13/2026 | 70.7% | Dying Slowly |
| 2/27/2026 | 66.6% | Dying Slowly |
| 2/13/2026 | 68.4% | Dying Slowly |
| 1/31/2026 | 70.3% | Dying Slowly |
| 1/17/2026 | 67.3% | Dying Slowly |
| 1/3/2026 | 60.2% | Dying Slowly |
| 12/21/2025 | 58.6% | Dying Slowly |
| 12/7/2025 | 63.0% | Dying Slowly |
| 11/23/2025 | 77.2% | Certified Zombie |
| 11/10/2025 | 76.3% | Certified Zombie |
| 10/28/2025 | 78.6% | Certified Zombie |
| 10/14/2025 | 67.2% | Dying Slowly |
| 10/1/2025 | 63.6% | Dying Slowly |
| 9/17/2025 | 66.0% | Dying Slowly |
| 9/3/2025 | 73.8% | Dying Slowly |
| 8/21/2025 | 59.5% | Dying Slowly |
| 8/7/2025 | 69.1% | Dying Slowly |
| 7/24/2025 | 70.9% | Dying Slowly |
| 7/11/2025 | 71.3% | Dying Slowly |
| 6/27/2025 | 69.6% | Dying Slowly |
| 6/13/2025 | 66.5% | Dying Slowly |
| 5/31/2025 | 76.8% | Certified Zombie |
| 5/10/2025 | 81.2% | Certified Zombie |
| 5/4/2025 | 79.8% | Certified Zombie |